035 | Unpacking the Harmful Effects of Religious Purity Culture

In the 1990’s, purity culture became the sexual education norm, whether or not you were in fact religious. Abstinence based education was taught in public schools and many millennials who had the sex talk with their parents received only “Don’t have sex before marriage, it’s dirty” without any other discussion of sexual empowerment. This created a culture of shame, guilt & trauma around women’s bodies and sexuality. In this part one of two episode series on purity culture, I dive into the depths of how this trauma warps our relationships with our bodies, sex and connection to spirituality.

Here’s what I dove into:

  • Purity culture exploits fear and shame emotions to guide young adults into viewing sex as dirty, sinful and disgusting.

  • Women learn that to remain pure they must cover up their bodies, shut down their flirtatiousness and romantic fantasizing - this leads to suppression of their feminine energy.

  • Comparing a woman losing her virginity before marriage to a crumbled up rose or a chewed up piece of gum causes emotional and spiritual trauma. Women put their worth in their bodies and sexual purity, which leaves them feeling inherently broken.

  • There’s shame in the silence of not talking about sex. This layers on shame, guilt and self-loathing onto our sexual thoughts, desires and experiences which damages the human psyche and spirit.

  • Purity culture breeds slut shaming, victim blaming in rape culture, marital rape, failure to set sexual boundaries, and causes women to seek out sex to earn love and worth.

  • Purity culture can also cause sexual dysfunction later on in life - little to no sex drive, painful sex, shutting down in experiences of connection with a partner and guilt during masturbation.

  • How to begin reconnecting with your body and pussy to repair a loving connection with your sexual energy.